Contemplations
by Apothecary's Rose
Summary: Sofi's thoughts on Jack, includes memories. One-Shot. Rated for language and safety. Mostly just angsty at end, and is NOT a romance between Jack and Sofi. First Four Brothers fanfic. Please be nice.


**A/N: -**deep breath- Okay, so I'm actually writing this. I've got to tell you guys I'm _extremely_ nervous about this fic here. I saw _Four Brothers_ on _TNT _well a while ago, which I'd been dying to see because I kept seeing it pop up in my search result for fanfiction. I saw it and immediately fell in love with it, rented it, and then my parents gave to me for my birthday, which was about a month ago.

Anyway, I got this idea a few days or so ago, and had almost the whole thing planned out. However, my computers have been rather moody, so I had to wait to type it, and now I can't remember every single detail. But I'm trying. Keep in mind this is my first _Fours Brothers_ fanfic, so again **very nervous. **

I know a lot of people don't really like Sofi, personally I think she's crazy and annoying, but she's okay. I started thinking about her relationship with Jack, and wonder what she might think of him. Btw, this is **NOT** a romance. I tried to make sure it makes sense and sounds IC, but if it doesn't, please let me know, but **NO FLAMES!**

Thank you!

**Rating: **Just really for safety, and some swearing.

**Disclaimer:** I do not, in any way, have ownership over_Four Brothers_, only in my dreams. They belong to the writers, whose names escape me at the moment. Oh, and the marvelous awesomeness that is John Singleton.

* * *

**_Contemplations_**

* * *

Sofi liked Jack. Yes, she was in love with Angel, but she liked Jack. In the little brother type way, of course. Surprising, no? He was quiet, shy, and a little detached. She was loud, annoying and a little obnoxious. But she liked him.

It's not that she didn't like the rest of the family. She appreciated Evelyn; of course everyone was fond of her. She was always kind and thoughtful, even when Sofi knew she didn't deserve it.

She thought Jerry was, well, normal, to a certain degree. He wasn't some loose cannon. He thought things through. He was smart and rational. He had a future.

And Bobby. Okay, maybe she didn't like him. Yes, she fought with him and could claim to hate him, but she had to respect, even just a little.

But there was something about Jack. She couldn't seem to put her finger on it. There was just something that made it almost impossible to dislike him.

She found this strangely funny, though. When she first met him, she didn't feel the same as she does now.

She remembered the first time she actually saw him. He was a small little boy, with messy blonde hair and wide blue eyes. He was so young. She could still remember Angel telling her to be careful when they were introduced.

"_**He's really shy around strangers. Had a bad past. Took forever to finally get him to open up to us."**_

_**She only nodded and smiled at Jack, holding out her hand. "Hello, Jack. I'm Sofi. It's nice to meet you." He'd shrunk back behind his mother's legs, muttering a small hello.**_

"_**It's okay Jackie. You can shake her hand." Evelyn nudged gently.**_

"_**Yeah, she doesn't bite." Angel said, smiling. Jack timidly shook her hand, then quickly let go. **_

"_**Only you'd know, Angel." **_

"_**Bobby!"**_

* * *

At first she'd felt sorry for Jack. She hadn't known all the details, but she knew he was pretty traumatized. He had nightmares. Really horrible ones. She knew this because sometimes he'd seek out Angel in the middle of the night

They would be in bed, usually already falling asleep. And then there'd be a light knock on the door, followed by his soft voice.

"_**Angel? Are you awake?" **_

_**Big brother was almost immediately out of bed, and collecting his clothes. He glanced back at her and then at the door. She nodded. She made sure she was dressed when he opened the door, to reveal a terrified Jack, his arms around himself. **_

"_**Have another nightmare Cracker Jack?"**_

_**He nodded. **_

"_**Want sleep in here tonight?"**_

_**Another nod. **_

She had understood, the first time. She thought it was sweet the way he was so caring for his baby brother. She didn't think it would happen more than once.

It wasn't very often. But it began to annoy her. She didn't like the fact that it seemed he always came to Angel whenever he had a nightmare. It wasn't until after Jack had happened to interrupt them while being "intimate" and Angel practically pushed her off him, when she finally decided to say something.

"_**I mean really Angel. He has your mother. Why doesn't he just go to her?"**_

"_**He does Sofi. But I guess he just feels a little more protected with his brothers. He's had bad experiences with adults in the past. He loves Ma and feels safe with her. But I don't know, I guess it's just a little different with us."**_

_**She scoffed. "So? He has **_three_** brothers, Angel. Not just **_one_**. Why does he have to always come to you? Why doesn't he go to Bobby or Jerry?"**_

"_**Shit, Sofi. He doesn't always come here. You just think he does. He goes to Bobby or Jerry, too. Usually goes to Bobby, actually."**_

She had huffed and turned on her side saying she refused to talk to him, anymore. She would bring it up every so often and he would just sigh and say something about her being melodramatic. Although sometimes he would get angry with her and tell her to just "Shut the fuck up and drop it".

She didn't fully drop the subject, until one specific night.

_**She'd gotten up to go to the bathroom, and on her way back to the bedroom, she'd heard whimpering and noticed Bobby's door was slightly ajar. She snuck over to it, and looked in side. **_

_**Bobby was awake, sitting on his bed and he was gently rocking back and forth, whispering to the form in his lap. **_

_**It was Jack. He was curled up, clutching Bobby's shirt, and he obviously had been crying. **_

_**Bobby rubbed his back and Sofi could barley hear him saying, "Shh, it's okay Jack. It was only a nightmare. You're safe here, remember? I'm not gonna let anything happen to you, I promise."**_

_**Jack had only responded by burying his face further into his big brothers chest, sobbing harder. **_

_**Sofi had turned around and snuck back into Angle's room. **_

She started thinking about what Angel had told her before. _**"Usually goes to Bobby, actually."**_

Now that she thought about it more, his tone of voice had almost sounded…jealous or maybe sad. Perhaps, that was why Angel always let Jack come in his room when he had a nightmare. He cared about his little brother greatly, she knew that. But little brother, apparently, preferred the eldest Mercer for protection. She supposed that if Jack had decided he wanted Angel's company instead, even for just a little while, it meant a lot to him.

She figured, if it made him happy, it wouldn't be so horrible to share him. Besides, Jack needed him more than she did.

* * *

After a while she started being nicer to him. They weren't close, but there wasn't really any awkwardness between them anymore.

As Jack had grown older, he'd started to take after his big brothers. He'd gotten clean from drugs and such, but as far as getting into fights went, well, he still had relapses.

_**It was in the winter, and Jack had gotten home from school expecting the house to be empty. Bobby was on one of his little trips, Jerry said he was going to be with his girlfriend, Angel was supposed to be out with Sofi and Evelyn was still at her job. He had been surprised when he saw Sofi sitting at the table staring out the window. **_

"_**What are you doing here?" He'd asked, trying to conceal his face under his hood. She sighed frustrated, "Angel told me he was going to be late. He's "working", or something."**_

_**She turned to look at him. "Are you okay?"**_

_**He nodded his head a little too fast. "Yeah, fine. Why do ask?" **_

_**She raised an eyebrow. "Why don't you put your hood down?"**_

"'_**Cause I don't feel like it." She was already up and moving towards him. Jack took a step back. "Jack, tell me what's going on."**_

"_**I don't kno-"**_

"_**Or, I'll tell Angel." **_

_**He sighed and pulled his hood down. Her eyes widened slightly, and she cursed in Spanish. His face was cut up, not too horribly, but he looked like he gotten beat up pretty badly. "Here, sit down." She grabbed his arm to pull him to the table, and noticed him wince. She pulled his sleeve back to reveal a bruise on his upper arm. **_

_**She ran to get the first aid kit and came back to sit next to him. "Take off your hoodie."**_

"_**Fuck, no." **_

"_**I just need to see if there are any other injuries." **_

"_**There aren't."**_

_**She sighed and just stared at him. "I'll tell Angel."**_

"_**I don't care." He muttered.**_

"_**Okay." She reached for her cell phone. "Maybe I'll call Jerry, too."**_

_**Jack rolled his eyes and huffed, "Fine." He removed his hoodie, now only in his tee-shirt, and she was able to see both arms clearly. **_

"_**You look like shit." She stated simply going to work on his wounds.**_

"_**You should see the other guy." He smirked slightly. She rolled her eyes, muttering something in Spanish. **_

"_**Was, this a fight in school?"**_

"_**No. I was just walking home, and some kid came over, saying some shit about not beating me up if I gave him 20."**_

"_**Really?" **_

"_**Yeah, I kicked his ass, though." She rolled her eyes, and when she was eventually done she looked at him saying, "Good as new."**_

_**He watched her as she packed the kit up. "You're not really going to tell them, are you?"**_

_**She looked at him skeptically for a moment. "Hmm, well I wouldn't have known if Angel wasn't being such a lazy ass." She smiled softly. "I don't think there's any need to tell him."**_

_**Jack looked surprised, as if trying to register what she just said. Then he smiled. "Thanks Sofi."**_

"_**Don't mention it, kid."**_

Things were different between them after that. Not drastically, of course, but still there was a mutual feeling of friendliness between them.

* * *

She'd tolerated Jack at first, and then grew to somewhat respect him. But it was the night she'd discovered Angel had joined the Marines, when she realized how much she appreciated him.

_**Naturally, she'd been upset when Angel had broken the news to her. And of course Sofi being Sofi, she'd made a huge fuss about it. She screamed at him, cussed him out in two different languages and everything. She somehow had found herself sitting on his front porch steps, wrapped up in his jacket. **_

"_**Aren't you cold, sitting out here alone?" She looked up to see the youngest Mercer, casually leaning against doorway, cigarette in hand.**_

"_**What do you want?"**_

"_**Nothing."**_

"_**Then why are you out here?"**_

"_**Just out for a smoke." She raised her eyebrow. **_

"_**And, Angel's on an angry rampage." She looked away, tears welling in her eyes. **_

_**He moved and sat down next to her. "You know, we're gonna miss him too." He muttered softly. **_

_**She scoffed. "I'm not going to miss that asshole."**_

_**He laughed. "Yeah, sure." There was a pause as he took a drag on his cigarette. "Don't you think you're being a bit selfish?"**_

_**She whipped her head and glared at him. "I'm not being selfish. Who fucking asked you anyway?"**_

"_**I'm just saying. You're acting kinda selfish."**_

_**She scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Oh, yeah? How?"**_

_**He took another drag. "Well, this seems like something he really wants to do. It could be good for him, or something."**_

"_**You're just repeating what your mother said."**_

"_**So?"**_

"_**Ugh, what about me? He didn't even think of me."**_

_**Jack rolled his eyes. "Damn, Sofi, you **_are _**selfish."**_

_**She opened her mouth to say something but Jack cut her off. "How do you know he wasn't thinking of you? I bet he was thinking of all of us. It was probably a really hard decision for him. But he's got to do this. For him." He sighed putting out his cigarette, and getting up. "I'm gonna go get some dinner. You coming?" **_

_**She looked up at him for a second. Then she said, "Sure, I'm starving."**_

_**Before they went inside, she grabbed his arm, having him turn to her. "Thanks, kid."**_

_**He smiled slightly. "Don't mention, Sofi."**_

* * *

Sofi would have smiled at the thought of all those memories, if the situation was different. But right now, they only made her cry harder.

She'd called 911, and they'd said they were sending an ambulance, but she knew already that it was too late. All she could do now was watch, as Bobby begged Jack to breathe, Angel tried desperately to stop the bleeding, and Jeremiah cried silently, softly calling Jack's name.

She watched him as he gave his big brothers a half smile and then slowly just…die. She was kneeling beside Angel now, her arms wrapped around him, his face buried in her shoulder. She just kept staring at the lifeless body. It'd all happened so fast, and it wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair. She saw Bobby get up, pure rage on his face. Her eyes followed him for a second before returning to the spot she was staring at before. A little while later she heard a gun shot, and Bobby was screaming or crying or something, probably both; she couldn't tell.

She just cried harder, holding Angel closer to her. She could hear him whispering his baby brother's name.

She was becoming overwhelmed and was wishing she had those moments back when Jack would come in the middle of the night asking Angel if he could spend the night in his room. She liked things better that way.

Sofi liked Jack. He'd become almost like a little brother to her. And as the memories played over and over again in her head, she'd realized she'd never actually told him that.

* * *

A/N: Well, wow. There you have it. I don't have a lot to say except that I hope you liked it, I hope it wasn't OOC, sorry for any spelling/grammatical errors, and please review, **BUT PLEASE, NO FLAMES!**


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